Say hello to this week’s Greatest Wrestler Ever:
Oops. Sorry, my mistake. That’s hollywood actor Jake Busey. Let me try that again.
Best Wrestler Ever (This Week): Robert Evans aka Archibald Peck
That’s more like it. Pictured above is the very serious wrestler, Archibald Peck, who is not Jake Busey. There is a resemblance there though, isn’t there? Maybe it’s just me.
As you may have noticed by the title, Robert Evans is The Man of a Thousand Faces. There’s the Barrister R.D. Evans, Marching Band Leader Archibald Peck, MMA fighter Mixed Martial Artie, and masked cowboy The Mysterious and Handsome Stranger. And more.
Follow me as I
try my best to give you a little background on the career of Robert Evans with…
Robert Evans’ Career Highlights
The Time Traveling Marching Band Leader
Archibald Peck’s debut match in Chikara wasn’t the most successful. He was defeated by Eddie Kingston after getting hit with Kingston’s Backfist to the Future. Kingston’s Backfist isn’t just a cleverly named maneuver, it actually wields the power to send someone back (or forward) in time.
Thus, after Kingston hit Peck with the Backfist to the Future, Peck was indeed (according to Peck himself), sent to the future.
While in the future, Peck got his hands on a sports almanac. He later used the valuable information in the almanac to defeat his opponents in the present. By using valuable information, I mean he cheated in his matches by hitting his opponents with his baton.
Mixed Martial Archie Will Tap You Out!
After Peck’s majorette, Veronica, ditched Peck for fellow wrestler, Mr. Touchdown. Peck felt that he needed to show Veronica just how big and tough he really was. Enter Mixed Martial Archie, quite possibly the greatest MMA fighter in the history of the world. Here, have a look at his most devastating, highest flyingest maneuver wrestling has ever seen:
Truly one of the greatest finishers in wrestling of all time.
Though he was successful in the ring, Mixed Martial Archie couldn’t win back Veronica. Worth noting however, is that in Mixed Martial Archie’s final appearance in the ring, he was taken out with a spinebuster on the entrance ramp delivered by Mr. Touchdown. The spinebuster took Archie out of the match, but he was replaced by none other than Archibald Peck. Peck successfully went on to lose (successfully lost?) the match and henceforth, due to the match stipulation, had to leave Chikara.
Enter The Mysterious and Handsome Stranger
With Archibald Peck gone from Chikara, a new masked wrestler made his debut. A mysterious, yet handsome new wrestler, going by the name of The Mysterious and Handsome Stranger.
In a fascinating development, it was later revealed by Barrister R.D. Evans that the Stranger was in fact Archibald Peck from the past. The Barrister explained that after the spinebuster to Mixed Martial Archie, Archie went to the back and got into a heated argument with Eddie Kingston. Kingston, as he is prone to do, gave Archie a Backfist to the Future, but this time, Archie wasn’t sent to the future, he was sent to the past. The way past. The Wild Wild West past. Here, Archie lived a Wild West lifestyle, and developed his new The Stranger persona. He was later sent back to the present (future?) after another Backfist to the Future, but this time not by Kingston, by the infamous outlaw Buford “Mad Dog” Tannen.
Confused? I know I am.
Peck may not have gotten Veronica back, but in the end she got her comeuppance when the Mysterious and Handsome Stranger poured pig slop all over her, and afterwards revealed himself to be Archibald Peck under the mask. Watch:
Chikara Grand Championship Match Hijinks:
Archibald Peck lost his Chikara Grand Championship match against Eddie Kingston via referee stoppage when he was distracted by…himself.
Nearing the end of the match, a second Archibald Peck appeared on the balcony of the arena. This appearance distracted the Archibald Peck in the ring, leaving him open to a Backfist to the Future by Kingston. Following the Backfist, the lights in the arena suddenly went out. When they were turned back on, both Archibald Pecks had disappeared. Like this:
During National Pro Wrestling Day 2014, Archibald Peck made one of the all time great entrances in the history of forever. Peck and fellow wrestler, 3.0 entered the arena via a DeLorean. Yes, you read that correctly, a fricking DeLorean. Here, look:
Meanwhile, in Ring of Honor…
At the time of writing, R.D. Evans is currently on an impressive winning streak in ROH. Recently he defeated “Unbreakable” Michael Elgin on ROH TV in a very convincing manner:
By convincing I mean that Elgin killed Evans to death, but in doing so got himself DQ’d, giving Evans the very hard earned win and keeping the monumental streak alive.
Oh I almost forgot. Rumour has it that Archibald Peck is also the man behind this another mask. The mask of The Latvian Proud Oak, member of The Baltic Siege.
The Latvian Proud Oak is the one without the hammer. It is not known for certain if it really is Robert Evans behind the mask. Decide for yourselves.
We’re not done quite just yet. To end this week’s column, let’s have a look at…
HiGIFstory of Robert Evans’ Greatest (And Not So Greatest) Moments
OH MY GAWD WHAT A STUNNER!
Not so great moment:
Not so great moment:
Does it still count if you submit to yourself?
Not so great moment:
I was sure there were more great moments than that. Oh wait, here’s one more.
On that note, it’s time to go. I hope you enjoyed the ride with Robert Evans.
Thanks for reading. See you next week for another Best Wrestler Ever.