You know what pro wrestling needs? A mechanical mummy with rocket fists. Oh wait, there already is one. But you know what I’d really like to see? A mechanical mummy with rocket fists AND a mecha drill wrestle Minoru Suzuki. Hold on, that’s already happened! Twice!
The first match was at a Ultimo Dragon Fiesta show all the way back in June, 2006. Mecha Mummy vs. Minoru Suzuki. How or why Minoru Suzuki ended up in a match with a mechanical mummy I’d love to know. Please tell me if you know the background to this. From Suzuki’s expression at the start of the match, it looks like he was wondering the same thing.
My favourite part of the match is at the start with Suzuki completely no-selling Mecha Mummy’s mecha-attacks, which include a rocket fist, and in the end some kind of Ghostbusters style proton back with what looks like a giant toaster attached to it.
As wacky and great that match was, the 2009 rematch in DDT is on a whole other level. It starts with Suzuki, in street clothes, asking for a match against Takayama. DDT General Manager Amon grants the match for a future show. Meanwhile, Mecha Mummy suddenly appears next to Suzuki. Amon mentions this to Suzuki, who looks at Mecha Mummy and says, “This? Nobody cares about this! I want Takayama!” Mecha Mummy then begins attacking Suzuki. Now, you might expect Suzuki and Mecha Mummy to head to the ring for an impromptu match. Well, it almost does, but they take a very unexpected turn when Mecha Mummy flies to Brazil with Minoru Suzuki hitching a ride on his back. Then we do get the impromptu match, broadcast “Live from Brazil.” Again, without spoiling anything too much, some of the highlights include Suzuki and Mecha Mummy taking a short fishing break during the match. Suzuki pausing the match in order to protect a single flower growing by the river. A very brief game of badminton. And a Benny Hill-esque chase scene. My favourite part is the explosive ending to the match, but make sure you watch ALL the way to the end. Things get…interesting.
Big thanks to Bonski who recommended these matches in a recent episode of the J-Shoot podcast, which you can listen to here.
As much as I love violent, serious Minoru Suzuki, comedy Suzuki is the best thing. Another great comedy match with Suzuki is one I wrote about here. It’s got a rocket bicycle, and one of the best Suzuki entrances ever. That’s all you need to know.
I don’t know what ever happened to the former DDT Iron Man Heavymetalweight champion, but I do hope he/it returns with the Mecha Drill someday.