Hey puropals! Long time no Best Wrestler Ever. What’s up with that? I blame the economy, particularly Greece’s economy. Never mind that though. We’re here now, that’s all that matters. Speaking of matters, wrestling matters. More to the point, the wrestler I’m about to talk about matters for many reasons, one of which is because she is the best wrestler ever this week!
That’s right! SHE! This week’s best wrestler ever is Stardom’s resident puroresu pirate, Kairi Hojo!
I say best wrestler ever this week, but really I should’ve written this back in June when Hojo had a match that caught my attention in a big, big way. But like I said, Greece’s economy. It’ll be the end of me. But before we talk about that total amazeballs match, how about a little background?
A Little Background
Kairi Hojo wrestles for joshi promotion World Wonder Ring Stardom, or just Stardom for you lazy sons of guns. Hojo was trained by Fuka, who is one of the founders of Stardom, and she’s a part of a team called Candy Crush (Not to be confused with Candy Crush, the popular mobile video game) with the very tanned and tall American wrestler, Chelsea. She’s also the current Artist of Stardom champion along with fellow Candy Crusher Chelsea, and Koguma. Oh, and by the way, Kairi Hojo is a pirate. And not an eyeball rolling yarghhh matey garbage pirate. No, Hojo is the best kind of pirate, the kind has theme music begins with the music from Disney’s Pirates of the Caribbean. The it doesn’t stop there. Hojo also has some great looking pirate themed ring gear to complete the package. However, there’s nothing a whole lot piraty about her wrestling. That’s probably for the best though. What would pirate style wrestling even look like? There are no ropes to swing from, so that removes about 80% of possible offensive manoeuvres.
It doesn’t involve any swords or ropes from which to swing, but Hojo does have one of the best looking moves in the biz right now, which I’m going to talk about. Right now!
Nobody, and I mean NOBODY drops an elbow like Kairi Hojo. It’s one of the most beautiful sights in the world. The airtime she gets would make Michael Jordan in Space Jam jealous. But it’s not just the height that’s impressive, it’s the style of Hojo’s movement that really makes it something else. Hojo leaps off the top rope with a big swing of her arms and kicks her legs up so that her upper body falls horizontally while her legs fall vertically. The result is that it looks like she comes down with all her weight in her elbow. It’s so great! It looks equally beautiful and effective. Here, take a look!
— Kevin Wilson (@purocentral) June 22, 2015
Thanks, Mr. Wilson.
Kairi Hojo isn’t just a one move wonder. She also utilises one of my all time favourites, the Sliding D, and she does a pretty solid spear too. Oh and I nearly forgot about her impeccable flying forearm.
— Another Ingobernable (@the_mosayat) September 16, 2015
Thanks, The Mosayat
But enough about cool movez with a Z. That’s not even the real reason why Kairi Hojo is the best wrestler ever this week. The real reason is what I’m going to explain next if you would just keep reading a little longer!
Why Kairi Hojo Is This Week’s Best Wrestler Ever
As I said at the top, I really should’ve written this back in June because that’s when Hojo had one of the best matches I’ve seen all year. No, all ever! June 14th, Stardom Galaxy Stars, Kairi Hojo defending the World of Stardom Championship against Meiko Satomura. If you haven’t seen it, go see it right now. If you have, you know what I’m talking about. Calling this one hard-hitting is an understatement. It was an absolutely brutal war, and I loved every second of it. Something that makes it especially great, and something I didn’t even know when I first saw it, is that Kairi Hojo only debuted in 2012. She’s only been a pro for three years and she’s already having incredible matches like this one. That’s so nuts! Something tells me the best is yet to come from Kairi Hojo. Meiko Satomura of course deserves equal credit for such an amazing match. I’m sure we’ll be seeing her in one of these columns in the very near future.
Alright well that’s enough gushing over Kairi Hojo for one day. If you’re not familiar with her already, I hope you check out some of her matches after reading this. You will not regret it, and that’s a Chris Jericho level guarantee.