I’ve recently discovered that I’m really drawn to a particular type of move in wresting that I’ve taken to calling Delayed Doom. I was going to call it Delayed Death, but that feels a little dark. Delayed Doom is a style of move where the wrestler holds their opponent in a position which they can’t move or escape the move before finishing them off. There are usually a few seconds where the opponent is just waiting for the trigger to be pulled before they’re slammed into oblivion. Delayed Doom.
Welcome to another Raw. Not a bad show this week. #HijackRaw was pretty ridiculous. What does that even mean? Where are you going to take it after you hijack it? To dinner?
Also a lot of the match ups were the same that we’ve seen before, as in last week, and the week before. Anywho…
It’s like a pipe-bomb, but by Paul Heyman. Not CM Punk because he didn’t show up for Raw.
Sit, relax! Make yourself at home.
Brock Kills Mark Henry. Again
Well, not immediately. But he does.
There it is.
You want to talk about guys getting buried -what the heck is going on with Mark Henry. He’s already been killed by Lesnar once. Why do it again? STOP WASTING MARK HENRY, WWE! He hasn’t got that much longer left. Make the most of him while you can.
I suppose all mark Henry needs to do is cut another good promo and beat up John Cena and he is instantly a monster again. But that doesn’t mean this is cool.
Usos vs. The Outlaws for the Tag Titles. Again
Congrats to the Usos for finally winning the belts!
And congrats on one of the best high-fives in history!
Cesaro vs. Big E. Again
After Cesaro hit the Giant Swing on Big E, Swagger came in and Swagger-bombed Big E, getting Cesaro DQ’d.
Cesaro was…less than impressed.
It feels like Big E and the Intercontinental title is secondary to the Swagger/Cesaro break up storyline.
And he’s back. Hulk Hogan kicked off the show, announcing himself the host of Wrestlemania XXX.
He’s not just doing his bit, he legit can’t hear you anymore.
Bootista vs. Albooto Del Boo-o
So many boos.
Alberto got a win over Batista after the distraction by Orton.
Looks like Batista is now embracing the boos and turning heel. Does that mean Orton is turning babyface, or will the Mania main event be a heel vs. heel match?
Either way, Hogan is unimpressed:
Elimination Chamber came and went with very few surprises. The highlight of the night was The Wyatts vs. The Shield in an incredible match. Certainly an early Match of the Year candidate. Despite the predictability, it was still a pretty fun show.
Enjoy the highlights!
Cody Rhodes and Goldust vs. Ryback and Curtis Axel (with Larry Hennig)
Not a bad Kick Off match. It was pretty cool to see Larry “The Axe” Hennig in his grandson’s corner. But kind of weird though as his son was on the heel team. Also pretty rough was Axel taking the pin for his team in his hometown. Pretty mean, WWE.
IC Title Match: Big E vs. Jack Swagger
Big E beat Swagger with the Big Ending. I think Big E has been studying some Lucha Libra tapes. For now on you can call him, E Grande.
Swagger, all style all the time.
Tag Team Titles Match: The New Age Outlaws vs. The Usos
In one of the few surprises of EC, the Outlaws retained the tag titles in their match against the Usos. Hopefully they’re just saving the Usos’ big win for Mania.
Friendship Over Match: Titus O’Neal vs. Darren Young
O’Neal went over Young. No surprises here. These guys had an OK match. The crowd though:
Hard Fart Victories!
Cesaro vs. Cena!
Cesaro has been firing on all cylinders lately. Last week on SmackDown he defeated Randy Orton in a great match. This week on Raw he had another great match, this time with Cena. Though he didn’t win, he came close, and that’s as good as you can get really when wrestling Cena.
Such strong, Cesaro!
It’s always great when Cena does something innovative in the ring, rather than just superhero comeback and quick AA for the win.
Also on Raw…